The Superclasico: How a Football Rivalry Divided a city

            Ah, Argentina. The birthplace of tango, Argentinian barbeque, and two footballing geniuses of Lionel Messi and Diego Maradona. It is no secret that when it comes to football in South America, this country, along with neighbor Brazil manage to establish themselves as giants of the world game. In fact, Argentina is the current world champion, having snatched the cup away from France last year in Doha, Qatar. You could say that football is engrained in every Argentinian, so much so, that even a simple football match can pretty much divide a nation.

 

            You might wonder, "how the hell does a football match do that?" The answer lies on the two teams whom we will discuss in this piece. I've told a bit about football rivalries when discussing the Kanjuruhan Stadium Disaster in the back of Indonesia's East Java Super Derby, but this rivalry would make the previous one seems a lot tamer; hell, even the famous El Clasico is no match for a football fixture of this magnitude. 

 

            Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you, the superclásico de futbol Argentino. or the superclásico as it's known to the world. This football fixture involves two teams hailing from the same side of the capital Buenos Aires, in specific, a barrio (neighborhood) called La Boca, which is known as the working-class people of the docklands of southern Buenos Aires. A little history lesson from yours truly: if you take a little peek at most of Argentina's population, you will find most of them had roots from Italy, specifically the Italian immigrants who settled in Argentina, and La Boca happens to be that one area with the most Italian diaspora. 

 

            Back to the topic at hand, two teams hailed from this part of the city, which is Club Atletico River Plate (River Plate) founded in 1901, taking their name from Rio de la Plata, and Club Atletico Boca Juniors (Boca Juniors), founded in 1905, and bearing the barrio's name. Both teams were formed in La Boca, but then, River Plate move to the more northern part of Buenos Aires, to a more upper-class neighborhood of Nuñez in 1925. Since then, Boca is known as the working-class club for the people, and adding to their Italian roots, they earned the nickname Xeneize (Genoese), reffering to their roots as Italian immigrants from Genoa. Whilst River Plate is known for their more upper-class fanbase, since they resided in Nuñez, and have a spending habit on signing players, they are known as Los Millonarios (The Millionaires). Despite this, nowadays you can find supporters of both teams on every societal level. Boca Juniors play their home games at the Alberto Jose Armando Stadium or known most commonly as La Bombonera (Spanish for the chocolate box due to the unusual shape), while River Plate call the Monumental Stadium (El Monumental) home. Boca's club colors are blue and yellow, while River Plate sports white and red.

 

            Both teams are known as two of the biggest teams in Argentinian football, sharing over 144 championships both in domestic and continental levels. Among those championships, River currently has more league titles (38 to 35 of Boca's), but Boca collected more Copa Libertadores (the South American equivalent of the UEFA Champions League) trophies (Boca's six to River's four) and more national cups. But beyond the prestige, there is one distinction that River holds but Boca has not: River Plate is currently the only club from the two to ever be relegated to the second division. River suffered this crushing defeat and relegation in 2011, by suffering a 3-1 defeat over two legs against Belgrano, which placed 4th in the National B Division (Belgrano defeated River 2-0 and drew 1-1 at El Monumental). Since then, River promoted themselves back to the Premier Division in 2012 and claimed multiple honors on the span of 7 years. Along the way, they collected two Copa Libertadores titles, 1 Copa Sudamericana title, and one Argentinian Super Cup. When it comes to overall head-to-heads, in 260 official matches across many competitions, both in domestic and continental level, Boca Juniors currently holds the advantage over River Plate, with 91 wins over 86 of River's, with 83 of those occasions where they share the spoils. Boca also lead in total goals scored, 334 to 317.

 

            Then what makes this rivalry so famous then? The answer is passion. Argentinians have an undying passion for football, especially when it comes to two of the biggest teams in the country. At the very least, many supporters of both sides have come up with various (and mostly degrading) nicknames for each other, as well as showing their supports to their own teams. When it comes to supporters of their own sides, they claim to represent not just the entire Buenos Aires, but also all of Argentina, with Boca fans calling themselves La Mitad Más Uno (Half Plus One), and River fans call themselves El País Menos Algunos (A Country Minus a Few). It is another story when it comes to the opposing sides, with Boca fans called River Plate las gallinas (chicken) due to the perception that River players lacked guts, supposedly given after River Plate's 1966 Copa Libertadores finals series loss to Uruguayan side Peñarol, and River fans called Boca Juniors either los chanchitos (little pigs) or bosteros (manure collectors) due to the claim that the area near La Bombonera always smells of bodily waste, and also the existence of a polluted river in La Boca. In every season, a fixture where River Plate is due to play Boca Juniors, there is a sense of anticipation and an air of tense glaring both neighborhoods; and every match is guaranteed a classic, from goals to growing tensions both on and off the pitch. Hell, even their playing philosophies are drastically different. River Plate tend to stick to the fundamentals, bringing the beautiful game for the spectacle. For them, a victory is only a victory if earned with honor, whilst Boca tend to have this "anything goes" mentality when playing their football. For Boca, the end result matters, no matter how clean or how dirty they have to play to achieve those results.And when the match took place, expect passion, drama, and outright hostility from both sets of fans. Hell, some of them can be described as utter chaos, like the Gate 12 Tragedy (Puerta 12 in Spanish) in 1968, where 71 lives were claimed and left 150 more injured, as a result of a stampede at gate 12 of El Monumental. There are many versions of the recounts as told by many eyewitnesses, and all involving several fans of either side acting aggressively to their opposing counterparts. 

 

            I've mention that the superclasico is the most famous football derby in the world, but what would happen if they threw a trophy into the mix? That was the case of the 2018 Copa Libertadores Final. Both Boca and River reach the final stage, which was contested over two-legged matches at the time, with the side with the most combined goals over two legs get their hands on the Libertadores title. The first leg, played at La Bombonera ended in a 2-2 draw, which means the title contention is still pretty much anyone's game. But by the time the second leg rolled around, slated to be played at El Monumental, chaos broke, as River fans bombarded Boca's player bus with various projectiles, even at one point broke some of the glass to allow pepper spray to enter the cabin. After much consideration from CONMEBOL, the second leg venue was moved to Madrid, more specifically the Santiago Bernabeu Stadium, home of 14-time UEFA Champions League winners Real Madrid, much to both River and Boca's chagrins. Despite all the setbacks, it was inside this hallow Madrid ground where River Plate prevailed with a 3-1 win after extra time (5-3 on aggregate). River would enter another Copa Libertadores final the next year, now played as a single game in neutral ground in a losing effort against Flamengo of Brazil, played in Lima, Peru. Boca Juniors would enter another final in 2023, and again losing to a Brazilian team, in this case Fluminense at the Maracana Stadium in Rio de Janeiro. 

 

            The selection of Madrid as the second leg final venue sparks an irony of its own, which deserves a piece of its own. But in a nutshell, "Copa Libertadores" literally translates to "The Liberator's Cup", owning its name to the leaders of the Latin American Wars of Independence who fought to liberate the region from Spain. It's important to note that both River Plate and Boca Juniors appealed this decision, along with Boca's another appeal to have River disqualified, which went bust.

 

            So, what do I think about this legendary rivalry? Consider that this is happening in Argentina, I have to say that the passion of the fans is unlike anything I've seen since I decided to follow football full time. From the north to the south, Buenos Aires have an undying football scene, and all thanks to both River Plate and Boca Juniors. I've watched some Copa Libertadores on my spare time, and I would love to watch some again to experience the atmosphere of South American football.

Marissa Matthews: The Fat Woman with the World's Biggest Victim Complex

 (Warning: Strong languages and rants ahead)

 

 

            To start this piece, let's recap (again) about what body positivity movement, or at the very least, what REAL body positivity really is. It's a movement aimed for people born with different bodies as a result of either a genetic condition, body forms, and irreparable injuries, be it amputations, scars from either fire or various accidents. That being said, according to some people, fat bodies should be included inside the body positivity agenda, aimed to destigmatize fat people amongst the societal life. In paper, this is a noble cause, but in reality, this is a total trainwreck. I have to apologize in advance, because in this piece, I'm about to go loose cannon on this subject matter.

 

            And from this movement, which nowadays resembles more like a undrivable shitbox of a rusty car rather than a well-oiled machine akin to a Le Mans Hypercar, came slew of "fat activists" who honestly, weigh more than all 20 Formula 1 drivers combined. (In)famous names like Virgie Tovar, Tess Holliday, even a shit-for-brains nutritionist Linda Bacon (I know she goes by the name of Lindo Bacon and the "they/them" pronouns but fuck it) who first coined the term "health at every size", which in Mortal Kombat terms, is like the Shang Tsung or Shao Kahn of body positivity/fat acceptance movements. Some of them don't even used the term "fat bodies", instead opted to use "marginalized bodies". I have to say this to open your eyes, BUT YOU ARE THE MOST PRIVILEGED CLASS OF THIS WORLD, YOU FUCKING LARDASS. 

 

            Onto the subject of this piece, and the information are a lot scarce than I anticipated. But this living cannonball is infamous for her horrible takes (some even said that it's either downright hilarious or offensive) when it comes to body positivity. Her name is Marissa Matthews, and she is from Ottawa, Canada. She is most active on TikTok (God, not this forsaken app again), with most of her content consist of either "what I eat in a day" videos, flaunting her flabby bits or responding to "hate speech" and "fatphobia" with real hate speech and body shaming. Her mouth is deadlier than the Chernobyl nuclear powerplant, the Fukushima nuclear reactor, the Merapi volcano and the supertanker oil spill combined.

 

            Let's take a look at some of her takes on body positivity, and I have to remind you, dear readers, that I have burned millions of my brain cells just to provide this for your entertainment. On one video, she replied to one of the comments from someone who lost weight after living their life as a fat kid reminding her of the long-term danger of obesity by saying "I don't care about you or your life... your experience does not warrant harassing me with unwanted health advice and your opinion on my body". First of all, you pea brain, they just wanted to share their experience to REMIND you of how dangerous being fat in the long run, not to harass your privileged, fat ass! 

 

            One of her signature bad takes is the difference between fat shaming and skinny shaming. According to her, fat shaming is rooted in systemic oppression, whether racism, homophobia, transphobia, and all of those leftist trigger words that other "activists" like to spew, while skinny shaming is simply bullying. Other takes including that the body positivity movement is founded by black LGBT fat people, hence those bogus connections. I have to call bullshit on that, because falling too far on either side of the scale is as equally dangerous as the other one. If you are too skinny, or even anorexic for that matter, is dangerous due to low food and energy intake to the point of constant starvation. In short, being too skinny could kill you if you underfeed yourself. What you perceive as "skinny", is what we as a normal society called "fit" or "normal". Whilst being too fat is equally dangerous, partly because instead of underfeeding, you overfed yourself and never paid any attention to your daily calorie intake. If you passed a point of no return, it would slowly kill you through complications on your body as a result of piling body fat. And for the second take, body positivity is meant to support EVERYONE WHO FEELS UNCOMFORTABLE INSIDE THEIR OWN SKIN. I have to reiterate that the movement, in its face and core values, meant for everyone with different bodies as a result of genetic deformities or disabilities be it from accidents or irreversible injuries. And the movement also open for literally everyone, whether black or white, straight, or gay or bisexual, and for everyone across the globe. Apparently, Marissa's head is so far up her own ass, that anything or everything she perceived is viewed through the lens of "fatphobia" would be deemed as such, even if the comments she read is as harmless as a falling leaf.

 

            And I guess that's just her brand of content, responding to some comments (remember, these comments are in no means harmful, just some PSA on the dangers of obesity with a bit of harmless trolling sprinkled on the side) with pure hatred, malice, and nonchalantly harass other people with differing opinions (and body size with various degrees of real disabilities) and brand them in one fell swoop as fatphobic. And this, in turn, landed her in trouble multiple times with TikTok, who deleted some of her comments for harassment and bullying. And what did she do? She blamed it on the app for deleting her comment and the commenter for getting her own comment axed for harassment. Yeah, talk about grace and poise right there. She is also a bit fucked in the head when it comes to the definition of "boundaries and consent". She loves to preach about those two topics, but in reality, she's a double standard holding bitch who apparently doesn't bother to respect other people's boundaries and always have her two cents about her "valid opinions" for those who do not want them. And she delivers them unsolicited. I can safely say that she has a planetary-sized victim complex if I've ever seen one. 

 

            And you are probably thinking, "is this woman even serious?" And unfortunately, she is as serious as she come. And come to think of it, at least some of the "fat activists" currently plaguing this God's green Earth is "strong and independent boss babes", but not poor Marissa Matthews. She is the exact opposite of the mantra, despite her manhole of a mouth spewing otherwise. She is actually a 27-year-old unemployed sloth who lives with her mother. And to top it all off, her mother is a textbook example of an enabler. Yes, we are dealing with a dependent fat woman and her enabling mother who sees nothing wrong in her "poor little baby". I know I said something about a mother's unconditional love, I discussed it while talking about Achraf Hakimi, which is a totally different story, but the way I see it, it's not love, it's borderline abuse. The mother literally set Marissa up for failure and an early death. 

 

            I really want to talk more about this trainwreck of a woman, but I am too burnt out to even consider continuing my research for this piece, not while losing more brain cells and IQ points along the way. All I can say is that Marissa Matthews is a textbook example of an ignorant, privileged fat activist who sees everything in one dimension, and dismissing other opinions by framing them as "fatphobia", while also weaponize her victim complex to avoid responsibility, even when the evidence is clear, and all stacked against her. Remember, if you want to be wherever you are, be my guest. But don't force your opinion on someone just because you view yourself as the most important person on the Internet. And one more thing. Don't be Marissa Matthews. She's one big bad influence.

Daniel Larson: The Next Chris Chan?

 (Warning: Strong languages, graphic references, and disturbing materials ahead)

 

 

            Well, let's get back to everyone's favorite internet subject: lolcows. If I have to be frank, this subject is one of my favorites to write, discussing several internet personalities who are famous for all the wrong reasons. But nevertheless, it's always an interesting topic to dive into, because you never know the full extent of the story until you research it yourself. Last time out, Chris Chan (born Christopher Chandler, now Christine Chandler) was the main subject when it comes to (in)famous lolcows. But then, came one man from Colorado, USA, who might be in par or maybe even worse than Chris Chan himself.

 

            Say hello to Daniel Larson. He was born on the 15th of November 1998 in Lancaster, California. Despite this, he is mostly based in Denver, Colorado. To say that he has a turbulent childhood would be an understatement, as he grew up in an abusive and neglectful home, fueled by his abusive mother and a possibly neglectful and enabling father. at age 11, he was separated from his parents to live with his grandmother, who is also allegedly enabling him. He was placed in Tennyson Center for Children as a means of rehabilitation until he was 14 years old. When it comes to his mental state, Larson has "a laundry list" of mental conditions according to his father, ranging from ADHD, autism, intellectual disability, bipolar disorder, and allegedly, even schizophrenia. For years, he was taken care by his grandmother up until her passing in 2019. And ever since, he's spending most of his time jumping from housing to housing, sometimes sleeping at the side of the road, as he is effectively homeless.

 

            Behind all those problems, young Daniel Larson still has some aspirations with his life, mainly for music and sports, but he is obsessed by the former so much, his other endeavors left abandoned to the side. He is also active on several social media platforms, most notably TikTok. His online escapades cemented himself inside the lolcow pantheon, similar to Chris Chan and Chance "Cyrax" Wilkins. There are two reasons why Larson is consistently trolled by the Internet, one of which is his music "career." Primarily, he used his TikTok account to document his escapades along the state of Colorado, all the way to California, and to say that those videos are pretty odd is saying it at the very least. 

 

            There are two main sagas that put Daniel Larson on the lolcow map, one of which is his aforementioned delusion that he is a famous musician. trolls used this to trick him into thinking that he is noticed by the biggest music labels, while actually, this is only a ploy to milk him just for the shits and giggles. The way this works is some trolls would pose as an executive claimed to be working with major labels who had taken an interest with Larson's music, which is as enjoyable as a big pile of horse shit. He would bite the bait and announce on his TikTok that he would be working with said label, who instead of facilitating his career, they would coerced Larson into doing some stupid and the most humiliating shit they ever pulled on him, and add to the fact that Larson himself is completely oblivious of this, it would only go well as a crazy way trolls would do to milk him off his content. Larson is also notorious for his NSFW contents on this platform, often subjected for multiple bans by TikTok for positing his buck nude contents, including the one instance where he flashed his dong during a livestream. I don't know what to say at this point, but since I've come in contact with degenerates like this, I'm not surprised anymore. 

 

            The second is his borderline creepy fixation on young singer Grace Vanderwaal. He first became aware of the young singer back when Grace made her appearance in America's Got Talent. He was captivated by her singing, and believed that Grace would suit him per his grandma's "wish" that Daniel should date her. It all started when Larson claimed that he and Grace are currently working on a "collaboration project", and subsequently confessed (this, of course, only happened inside his twisted mind). He then proceeded to announce to his fanbase that he and Grace were officially dating, but in fact, she hardly even knew the guy, let alone agreed to date him. This, then, emboldened the trolls to pose as Grace, and again, coerced him to do the vilest shit the Internet has ever recorded. 

 

            I did mention that Larson has a slew of mental disorders and illnesses, right, well, you can pretty much find every single disorder under the sun, ranging from autism, ADHD, borderline personality disorder, even schizophrenia. But that is not the only thing that Larson suffered from. His physical condition is not well either, as he spends all of his time in the day walking on foot, getting sunburn while at the same time, cared too little about his hygiene. And this is the same guy that boast about being a famous musician and dated Grace Vanderwaal. Sure, he has quite a posture, standing in 1.77 meters (5ft 11 inches) tall, but he's pretty skinny in that stature, only weighing 52kg (115lbs). As per the time of the writing, it is speculated that Larson is actually lost more weight since, counting to the fact that he is currently homeless. 

 

            For starters, since he pretty much walks on foot, he has some foot conditions like trench foot, which is what happened when someone's foot is exposed to excessive moisture for too long, likely got its name from war times, since trenches during the time were always wet. His ankles are also heavily inflamed, likely because he never stops walking, which in turn, worsens his trench foot. He has other issues plaguing both his feet, such as plantar warts and severe blister. When you thought his foot problems are bad, wait until you read this: Daniel Larson have scabies infested inside him. This particular condition is a highly contagious one, caused by a small mite named Sarcoptes scabiei, and it's easy to spread and hard to treat, often times the clothes of the infected is discarded and destroyed, and the person being put in strict containment.

 

            His dental health is also as bad, if not worse than his foot or even his mental state. He is confirmed to have hypodontia, which is a condition that affect his dental development, and he has missing teeth due to this. On the other side, he also has some teeth out of position, and suspected to have an overbite, since in his videos, he talks to the camera with two of his front teeth showing, which is also have two different sizes, allegedly from unfixed crowding. 

 

            In short, the story of Daniel Larson is as intriguing as well as strange to put it mildly. He is in many ways similar to Chris Chan and Cyrax, but in a more frightening sense, since he is practically homeless, not cooped inside his room like the aforementioned two. From his social media escapades, his obsession with a young female singer, and his "music career", he is constantly being targeted for trolling, sometimes to the extreme extent. If I have one single advise for this guy, is to get off social media, get yourself a stable life (that means a home, a job, and a stable income), and for the love of all that is holy, get yourself cleaned up.

"Go Woke, Go Broke": A Tell-tale Stories of Companies Crashing Down

 (Warning: Strong languages ahead)

 

            To start this piece, let's remember the story of King Midas, who is said to possessed "The Golden Touch" in a literal sense, capable of turning everything he touched into gold, as per his wishes as told by the Greek Mythology. His ability is viewed as both a blessing and a curse, as the Golden King himself turns everything into gold just with a mere touch of his fingers, including his own daughter. He said to have died of starvation due to his supposed gift. But imagine now those same exact powers, but minus the "gift" aspect, only a full-blown curse, then you get the woke culture, modern feminism, and the "Diversity, Equity and Inclusion" Mantra. 

 

            We all see in recent times when big corporations trying to expand to include these "woke" groups who claim themselves to be "marginalized" but in reality, these people are the most privileged out of all American class. First of all, we're starting from the main catalyst that kick-started this hot mess, the situation between the beer brand Bud Light and a supposed "trans influencer" and female appropriator Dylan Mulvaney. We all know what transpires this disaster, and it all began when Mulvaney threw a party to celebrate his 365 "days of girlhood". Something that he came up with after he realized that being a "non-binary" is not enough for him to gain a massive following. Hell, an esteemed actress like Drew Barrymore even knelt before the jackass. Moving on, after that event, Mulvaney started to get various endorsement deals, one of them was from the Anheuser-Busch beer company, which is the parent company of several well-known American beer brands like Budweiser, and of course Bud Light. 

 

            And to support the campaign, Bud Light issued new packaging of their commemorative beer with Mulvaney's face printed on it, with his exaggerated, obnoxious, and creepy smile. Prior to this fiasco, the fucker appeared as an ambassador for beauty product Ulta Beauty, by participating in a podcast hosed by the company. To say that the interview was a hot mess will be an understatement. On the other side, Nike, the American sports brand, also did an endorsement deal with the dude, and on his video, he was depicted dancing (obnoxiously, mind you) while wearing the Nike sports bra, which is obviously designed for women who are BIOLOGICALLY VERIFIED BY THEIR FUCKING HORMONES AND GENITALS.

 

            And sure enough, backlash ensued. Anheuser-Busch suffered a massive loss in the stock market, with millions and millions of either Budweiser or Bud Light beers piling up unsold. And this is not an isolated incident as well. Thousands of Americans who are fed up with the whole woke culture banded together and launch a massive boycott around the United States, purchasing alternative beer brands aside from the ones by Anheuser Busch. Nike is no different either, as the brand faced harsh blowbacks over the deal, even some (real) female athletes called for boycott over the brand deal. Just recently, the department store Target launched an LGBT friendly fashion line AIMED FOR KIDS! Not only that, the fast-food chain like Chick-Fil-A, once celebrated by conservative Americans for their religious platform has now fell off the cliff and endorsing the woke LGBT agenda. And this is done en-route to the month of June, known otherwise by the rainbow mob as the "Pride" month. Ironic? I know. Dedicating an entire month to the heaviest and deadliest sin of all seven deadly sins must be hard on your asses.

 

            Despite all the outcry, companies who turn to wokeness for profit is not a new issue. There is one standard scoring index that literally grants and deducts points solely based on how woke the corporations can be, and it's called the Corporate Equality Index (CEI). This dumpster fire is proposed by the group called Human Rights Campaign, probably one if not the biggest left-wing, Soros-funded human rights group in existence. the premise of this index is to literally judge every corporate entity in America on how well they can pander to these groups, including, but not limited to: LGBT+ inclusion agenda, race-based segregation of the workforce, and gender-based policies, which recently heavily favors women (but ironically, nobody even knows what a woman is). In other words, companies are deemed "inclusive enough" if all of their policies and working environment are not based on profits and financial performance, but based on how they can squeeze as many "marginalized" workers and market themselves to be as woke as possible to the point of no turning back. This is literally the same as the one being implemented in China, called the "Social Credit Score". The premise is, the better you behave in the eyes of the government, the more social credit score you get. The more unruly you behave, and you lose all of your credit score. In reality, this is total control.

 

            Usually, I am saddened when a business that has been built for years with money, blood, sweat and tears must close its doors, often permanently, but in this case, I am actually rejoicing. Why, you may ask. I say this because unlike those businesses that unfortunately closed during the pandemic three years ago because of lack of financial support, these corporations are boycotted at the very least all because of their own decision to shove woke agendas into their consumer base. No wonder people started to look elsewhere for alternatives when the brand that they're used to suddenly caved into the alphabet mob and spewed the "Diversity, Equity and Inclusion" bullshit while at the same time neglecting their own consumers who just wanted a good product. 

 

            I guess what I'm trying to say is the woke ideology is not for everyone. As many would always say, "whatever happens in the western world, stays in western word". While human rights issues continue to be the center of mankind, forcing ideologies that would otherwise clash with traditional values of one country is not a good idea, especially when done by big corporations with only profit on their mind.

Fat Acceptance Movement: Destroying Their Own Bodies One Large Meal at a Time

 (Warning: Strong language galore, rants, and a TON of fat jokes ahead)

 

(If you are an easily offended snowflake, don't read this piece. You'll be offended within 10 seconds)

(This piece only uses the metric and kilogram scale for measurement)

 

            I don't know how this world works anymore. It seems like we as a society are heading towards an unprecedented level of total idiocracy, with clashing ideologies and a lot of people claiming to be "oppressed" (give me a break). I used to be sympathetic with some movements like the body positive movement, which in theory celebrates human bodies of all shapes and sizes. As per my statements in previous piece, my understanding of this movement is for people with conditions outside their control, whether physical deformities or disabilities as a direct result of irreparable injuries. But these days, the once peaceful movement has been hijacked by people who are basically too lazy and too ignorant to see the bigger picture. They elected to destroy their own bodies by eating too much and moving too less instead of bettering themselves, all in the name of body positivity.

 

            And yet, people who wants to speak out against this movement, called fat acceptance movement are called every fucking name under the sun, most notably "fatphobia" (for fuck's sake), "hater", and my favorite, "thin privilege". Well, thanks a fucking lot. The movement itself defined as a social movement seeking to eliminate the social stigma of fatness from social attitudes by pointing out to the general public the social obstacles faced by fat people. Again, in theory this seems like a good idea, but in reality, the movement itself has been viewed as a total wreck, from ignoring studies that clearly say that 60% of causes of death in the United States are linked to obesity to some degree, the act of body shaming against people who just want to be fit and healthy, to the apparent double standards enforced by these bulldozer-looking women. Yes. I said women, because according to this shit-for-brains fat activists (whom are all women for some reason), fat women are seen as beautiful and brave, whereas fat men are seen as disgusting fat fucks. Nothing more, and nothing less. Just disgusting fucks. This is what I have issue with to be honest. Like I said many times, I've lost too many of my family members for weight-related conditions. My uncle (rest his soul) passed away for several complications like high blood sugar and cholesterol, added to the fact that he, along with several family members from my mother's side, tends to gain weight easier. 

 

            The first one that grinds me heavily on this subject is the sheer hypocrisy of the body positive movement, as a direct result of the fat acceptance movement. For these overgrown rhinos, being a bit larger (well, a bit larger as in weighing like a literal elephant) than average is viewed as empowering, whereas people who like to stay fit, controlling their daily calorie intake and exercise ever so often are instead viewed as the enemy of the body positive movement, calling them "slaves of diet culture". First of all, diet is NOT A FUCKING CULTURE! It is only the way of someone eats on a day-to-day basis from food choices to portion sizes. People who have this kind of mindset is usually suffers from an alleged eating disorder appropriately named "binge eating disorder". You see, addictions of any kind are never good, much less doing something too much or too less. Whereas drugs, alcohol and sex addiction are viewed as bad, somehow, food addiction (mostly junk food in this case) is often overlooked, or in this case, rather encouraged. Virgie Tovar is the name that instantly came up to mind when I think about a "fat activist" who advocates for binge-eating without any guilt. This author, fat activist, and a literal sloth with flabby body parts actually encourages impressionable souls to each as much as they want without all the care in the world, continuously racking up kilograms until you end up on an episode of My 600-pound Life (or should I say, My 272-kilogram Life). Thanks Tovar, you utter jackass.

 

            The second thing that annoys me about this shitstorm is the term "heath at every size". Let me correct you overweight hippos right there. There are certain sizes that can be deemed medically as unhealthy, either you look like a literal twig like Eugenia Cooney (bless her heart, but she really needs to start eating more) with only skin and bones or being so huge, you create a tremor or a minor earthquake every time you take a step like Tess Holliday (sorry not sorry, lose some weight, you wrecking ball-looking woman, you are not a fashion model). Apparently this trainwreck of a movement has existed since the 1960s, but in 2008, a book of the same name written by (oh the fucking irony) a nutritionist named Linda Bacon (now Lindo Bacon, for some fucking reason) skyrocketed this movement to new heights. At first, what she said is completely sensible, by adopting good behaviors and to forget weight changing as a goal, and embrace the bodies that the people are living in. In theory, this movement is created to destigmatize people with extra kilos, but at the same breath, it's been overshadowed by the need to push that obesity is not unhealthy in any way (don't take my word for it). I believe that these panzer tank folks took Linda's (fuck it, I'm referring this person as Linda. If you want to scream bloody murder to me about transphobia, homophobia, or anything for that matter, be my fucking guest) words out of context and use them to weaponize their shit argument that you can be fat and being fit at the same time (which is an oxymoron). Hell, Linda herself even states that in order to win the war against fat is to give up the fight itself. Thanks Linda, you goddamn hypocrite.

 

            The last but not least, it's the SURPLUS amount of fucking toxicity plaguing this very movement. For influencers or celebrities advocating body positivity and health at every size who weights approximately three times the size of a hauler truck, they have this pressure to keep their image as a body positive advocate to never do anything that could insinuate "intentional weight loss". This is what happened to the singer Adelle. This fine lady at first was a bit bigger during her first 2 album cycles. Members of the fat acceptance community praised her for just being her, with all those extra fats. Then the bombshell dropped when she posted a photo on her Instagram page looking a lot thinner than before. In fact, she lost a whooping 45 kg (100 pounds). And you think that the community would still stand behind her after all this time, right? Well, you are DEAD. FUCKING. WRONG. She is swiftly denounced and subsequently blasted and hated by those walking cannon balls for "intentionally losing weight in the name of personal health". SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP. She's doing it for herself seeking no fucking approval from you oversized wankers who only wants to sit your fat asses down gorging on gross food. Hell, I'm starting to suspect that secretly, you all wanted to be like Nikocado Avocado, minus the OnlyFans stuff. All things aside, Adelle is thriving in her new appearance, pumping hit song after hit song after hit song. Thanks Adelle, you absolute legend. 

 

            I swear to The Almighty God, these fat activists, who weighs more than a fucking Formula 1 car (with the driver onboard, take George Russell or Esteban Ocon for example) are constantly pushing their shit message of "body positivity" by endorsing large corporations and forcing other people to make them a "safe space", and those who disagrees with them, even slightly is deemed fatphobic. One time I discovered a story about a beauty salon opened in 2017 catered specifically for women 272 kg and above. The owner of that salon is a woman weighing 225 kg named Jamie Lopez, who once broke a chair while visiting a beauty salon. Her countermeasures for her salon are to enforce the chairs inside the establishment, so they can support up to 362 kg of humanity. Aside from normal beauty services, customers (or in this case, hauler trucks) are served with mimosas and various sweet treats like cupcakes while being treated. Basically, only whales are allowed inside. I guess we should set up an earthquake station near that salon, because I reckon the seismic activities must be huge with all those large women around. Another one is when I discovered a TikTok page belonged to a "plus-size traveler" who once ranted about having to pay for extra seats just because the seat she booked couldn't fit her enormous cannonball size of a human body. I said this once in a video (which has since been deleted for "harassment and bullying", thanks a fucking lot, TikTok), and I'll say it again for good measure: Society doesn't owe you shit, but you owe society every-fucking-thing. If you want that extra seat, buy it like you would buy airplane seat for two! Don't pull your victim card when everything is not up to your delusional scenario.

 

            All I can say is, being positive about the body you are born with is not an unhealthy thing. It goes with the notion of self-love. By nourishing your body with all the necessary nutrients, you'll be able to live a healthier, more fulfilling life. One advice though, you should NEVER in any circumstance listen to these fat influencers. They don't really care about your well-being, much like they don't care about theirs either. In the end, the choices we made in live are matter the most for our well-being. And if you chose the wrong ones, then be prepared to suffer those irreversible consequences. Grow yourself and be an Adonis, not a Tess Holliday or a Virgie Tovar. If you think that behind this piece is a straight, white, American Christian man, you are dead wrong. I AM STRAIGHT, no surprise there, but I'm a brown-skinned Indonesian Muslim man. Eat your fucking heart out.

The True Kitchen Nightmare: The Story of Amy's Baking Company

 (Warning: Strong languages ahead)

 

            I have to say that during my 27 years of living on this planet, I am not a fan of reality television. These programs, even though have good intentions of showcasing regular lives of ordinary people, are cringeworthy for most of the time, as these same ones are watched by millions of people not because of the journey that these regular people have been through, but for all the drama surrounding it, and sometimes, the showrunners, producers, even the networks that authorize the broadcast often ask for more drama to attract more viewers, and in turn increasing their ratings to earn more profit, sometimes in the expense of the talents involved. 

 

            But even though these shows are allegedly not as real as they can be, some shows can be as a steppingstone to fame, or in this case infamy of the parties involved. And one establishment gained their notoriety thanks to a reality show centered on rescuing failing culinary institution. The program I'm currently talk about is called Kitchen Nightmares, hosted by non-other than the Scottish culinary legend Gordon Ramsay. The premise is pretty simple, Ramsay would travel across the United States to hopefully help saving various struggling restaurants, often drowned in extensive debt. On one side, this program paints a light about the culinary industry as a whole, that it's not all about serving good food and being a contributor to the community, but also the business side of it, and some restaurants are more struggling than everyone else. On the other, it also highlighted the grim reality that some restaurants, if not managed property, no matter how hard the efforts, would instead sink faster than it would be capable to do. 

 

            The program's format works as follows: Gordon would respond to the restaurant's request for help and traveled to said restaurant. His first step is to observe the both the exterior and the interior of the establishment, and to sample some of the dishes that the place offered. Most of the time the food is either bad at best or disgusting at worst. After the initial assessment, he would confront the staff and the owners and explained what went wrong with the food, often with explosive results. The show then moved to dinner service inspection, where Gordon oversees how the service was conducted, most of the time also ended in failures. At this point, he may be inspecting the cleanliness of the kitchen and the walk-in freezer, and in the majority of that occasion found nothing but filth, mold, rust, even expired and contaminated ingredients (cross-contaminations are prevalent, by mixing cooked ingredients with raw ones, especially meat and poultry products). After concluding and identifying the problems, he then proceeded to overhaul the establishment by revamping the interior and its menu, and the episode ends with the restaurant's relaunch, and Gordon left the place and continuing on his journey. Most of the time, the format has stayed in this formula for most of the show's time on air, until one establishment came and wreck it all forever.

 

            Let's stop by Scottsdale, Arizona, and meet Salomon "Samy" Bouzaglo and his wife Amy, owners of Amy's Baking Company. Samy invested roughly over US$ 1 Million to the place, which was first opened its doors in 2006 as a way of fulfilling her dreams in the culinary arts. Samy is an Israeli national while Amy is American, both were married by the time the episode aired. Initially, they send their SOS to Gordon for "bad review-driven loss". Not only that, but they also have a surprisingly high staff turnover in the show's history. The episode's cold open showcased the couple's utter insanity, but not until Gordon arrived, when they finally reveal their true colors. At first, Ramsay was pleased by the interior of the restaurant, the cleanliness of the kitchen and the freezer, and also praised Amy for her exceptional baking skills (Mind you, looking at their behavior as depicted at the time, this is allegedly Amy and Samy's way to distract Gordon from the real problems at hand). But when it comes to their other products, however, let's just say it left a bad taste on his mouth. 

 

            And this is not limited to the gastronomy side of the restaurant, the staff treatment, as Gordon would find out, is as equally appalling. One server, Miranda, whom he met during filming revealed that she never made any tips from waiting tables, as the money she rightfully deserved went to Samy instead. Samy justified this by saying that he's the one working front house most of the time, albeit poorly (He is technologically crippled, as he demonstrated his inability to operate a point of sales (PoS) machine properly). It is revealed towards the end of the episode that the establishment has fired over 100 staff members in the span of 18 months (initial number was 50 according to a former employee). Come dinner service, the reality quickly descends on Gordon as he found out the reason why the food was sub-par, but not the desserts: Samy never told Amy about the problems and mishaps of her cooking, and she would instead deny any wrongdoings. It also became clear that the "fresh ravioli" offered in the menu was actually cheap, store-bought, frozen ones. The Scotsman then announced that ravioli is off the menu, much to Amy's chagrin. She also blamed others for her own mishaps as well; she accidentally told Kate, one of the servers the wrong table number while serving an order, but when asked to verify, she instead accused the waitress of "having an attitude". 

 

            And for the pièce de résistance, Gordon caught Samy pocketed the tip meant for the waitress, and proceed to tear him a new one, sparking a profanity-laced argument that ends with Amy shutting down operation and Kate, the poor waitress fired on the spot. During the final moments, before the inevitable truth, he tried to list everything that was wrong during the service, but the husband-wife team refused to listen. After that shocking turn of events, as well as finding the restaurant closed the day after service, and several interviews with former staff members, Gordon finally came to one unanimous conclusion: Samy and Amy Bouzaglo are too far gone and beyond help to the point of no return, and it's best for him to steer clear. For the first time ever, after roughly 5 seasons, on the 16th episode of the 6th season, Gordon Ramsay walked away from Amy's Baking Company before he could save it. This went down in history of the show as the one who got away, a restaurant he was forced to walked away from before he could salvage.

 

            After the episode had aired, the restaurant, as well as Amy and Samy became an overnight sensation (in a bad way, of course), capitalizing on their infamy to gain more traction online, only to be met with more harsh reviews and trolls from those who want the laughs. At this point, they are pretty much the biggest lolcow both online and offline. Let me tell you, it's all because of the memes. But how did the Bouzaglos responded to this? In true unhinged fashion, especially on their facebook page, millions and millions of angry comments flooded the facebook timelines, but when it comes to clarify those comments denouncing the critics, these jackasses had the audacity to lie, telling the press that the supposed facebook page had been hacked. Some encounters after the episode detailed even more unhinged behavior, particularly from Samy, as he was once confronted a customer while holding what appears to be some form of a bladed weapon, most likely a kitchen knife. But Samy again denied this, claiming that the object he held was actually a pen. Hell, they once ended up in another TV show, this time Dr. Phil, where they were confronted by Dr. Phil himself about their behaviors before and after Kitchen Nightmares. Spoiler alert, they are still the same delusional jackasses that Gordon encountered. The fucking audacity of these two bozos. 

 

            Soon, internet detectives began to dig up both Amy and Samy's pasts and discovered horrifying facts about their previous endeavours. Amy Bouzaglo, or rather, Amanda Bossingham, was once involved in a bank fraud case of "misuse of social security number" in 2003, where she attempted to apply a US$ 15.000 bank loan using her ex-husband’s last name. As a result, she served almost one year in prison. Samy on the other hand, has even more grim record, as he is banned from France and Germany, and has records involving drug distribution, extortion and making threats. Some even say that the dude has ties with the mafia, although the details are mostly unspecified. This revelation then came back to bite Samy in his Israeli ass, as he was deported back to the country (?) in 2018. 

 

            So, what happened with Amy's Baking Company after all the fiasco? In short, the restaurant ceased to exist in September 2015. Amy herself tried to publish a cookbook but ended up with little to no success. After closing the doors for good in Scottsdale, the couple moved to California until Samy's eventual deportation. Nowadays, they spend their lives in Israel, with Amy resuming her baking endeavors and opening her own bakery. Kitchen Nightmares has since stopped airing, concluding its seventh and final season on the 12th of September 2014, putting an end to the program started in 2007. In its place, a similar program called Gordon Ramsay's 24 Hours to Hell and Back aired between 2018 to 2020, as the pandemic hit the world. There had been talks to revive the show, but so far, it is still in the works.

 

            To bookend this piece, I must say that the culinary industry, although is quite glamorous with all of the indulgence of sense, taste, and smell, is one hell of an industry to ever existed. Chefs and all restaurant personnel are working tirelessly behind the scenes to deliver delicious crafts of gastronomy for the wider population to enjoy. Programs like Kitchen Nightmares painted us a harsh reality that if an establishment is managed incorrectly, either for low standards, toxic working environment, possible health hazards, and even delusional and insane restaurant owners could lead that restaurant into bankruptcy and eventually forced to shut down for good. And with Amy's Baking Company, their delusions and refusal to change their ways proven to be their own downfall. And that is the true kitchen nightmare.

Hitting the Wall: The Painful Side Effect of Western Feminism

(Warning: Strong languages and sexual references ahead)

 

            Ah, feminism. The movement that once praised for granting women around the world the right to vote, right for education, and equality of opportunity as their male counterpart. The same movement that once advocate for women around the world to pursue their careers without sacrificing their fundamental role: raising the next generation. But nowadays, thanks to the fourth wave of this movement, it went from a trailblazing empowerment into an utter laughingstock, as women (at least in the Western hemisphere) who are so emboldened by the feminist movement, went from desirable to unattractive as they age, believing that their "strong and independent" mantra would work wonders attracting men.

 

            I want to proceed into this piece by saying that this is not about belittling the members of the opposite sex, but to highlight some of the problems plaguing the current Western society as a result of the modern-day feminism. And I am sorry ladies, but this is too hilarious to ignore, as a man myself. Now let's start with the first mantra of the current feminism movement: "Strong, independent boss babe." At this point, it's already clear that men and women are roughly equal when it comes to job opportunities. So much so, that women around the Western hemisphere boldly declare that they "no longer need men" to care for them. But when we talk about radical feminism, we also need to talk about the absolute double standard that they imposed onto the society. They claimed themselves to be independent, but when it comes to the dating scene, they expect everything and anything that they can get their hands on to be freely handed to them, with the expense of the man's financial stabilities. Moving from their "strong and independent mindset", we arrived at the one thing that any man with common sense have mutual hatred towards, modern dating disasters. Women nowadays are so in control over a man's romantic fate, one right swipe on a dating app would change a man's life forever, often times for the worse. And they did this with the help of social media algorithms. Women would often judge men by their material possessions, while men are judging women by their physical beauty. But on the inside, women are more emotional, whilst men could still think straight using their logics. Let me just put it this way: if a woman sees a tall, muscular, handsome man, she will do anything to grab his attention, even if that guy might have a literal harem on his expense. For these ladies, as long as he exhibits a "bad boy energy," she would smash him. But if a man meets a woman, he has to be convinced that this girl would stay with him long-term and willing to support him unconditionally. But if that woman claims herself to be a "strong and independent" who works two jobs and capable of sustaining herself (And I bet her second job involves OnlyFans, but who am I kidding) or that she has history of numerous infidelities with other men to the point of having multiple baby daddies, then the woman's value would sink faster than the Titanic ever did in the man's eye.

 

            The second aspect of why modern feminism works like the touch of King Midas, but instead of turning into gold, it turns everything into utter crap is the toxic dating advices offered by several female influencers on various social media platforms like TikTok. One of which is to treat the man that they're dating like a fucking walking ATM for every fucking shit that they want to get their hands on. This is prevalent around female social climber who can easily get those stuff on their own, but instead exploited a man for his fortunes. Once the charade's been broken, the man would simply just walk away. And this can unfortunately extend to the family system, as married men are susceptible of their wives' infidelity, and ended up losing every single penny they got, all because of the family courts system (in the Western hemisphere, mind you) that heavily favors women (PSA, do what Achraf Hakimi did before thinking of settling down with a woman). 

 

            Not only that, but there is one thing that the men are constantly in danger of, and this is one of the reasons why men are somewhat unsure if they want to enter the dating market. That threat is known as "paternity fraud". The premise of this crime is to name a random man as the father of the woman's child, fully aware that the same man might not be the one who performed the conception of said child, all in the name of financial advantage in the form of child support (this is mostly American cases). Hell, in some cases total strangers can be accused of this, and women are getting off scot-free at best, or just a mere slap in the wrist at worst. 

 

            These two points then, produced two side effects that would bite the modern feminists in their botox-infused ass. One of which is the "Men Going Their Own Way" Movement. This movement is basically men who want nothing to do with women in terms of serious relationship or financial stability. Blue Collar Men are fed up with constant female manipulation, gaslighting, and outright abuse they have to endure while in a relationship. So, they decide to simply walk away from it all. refusing any female advancement encountered along the way and rekindle their sense of "brotherhood" where "bros coming first before hoes". They essentially leave the "Chads" and "Tyrones" to do the dirty work for them and flip the script on these women to teach them a lesson on how not to mess around a man's genuine romantic feelings.

 

            And finally, is the rise of the "Passport Bros" movement. The premise is pretty simple and straightforward. Basically, a Western man going overseas in search for a better life, and consequently, a woman who still values family over herself. You know, those "traditional wife" types. This movement exist as the breaking point of men who are tired of being exploited, tossed aside, and shunned, all in the name of "empowering womanhood" (oh for fuck's sake, knock the fuck off). And what did they do? They applied for a passport, book a one-way ticket to any country around the world, whether it's the Latin America (Colombia, Peru, Brazil, and the like) or it can be as far as any Eastern hemisphere country (mostly either Thailand, The Philippines or anywhere in Southeast Asia or Greater Asian continent as far as my knowledge). And I wonder how the fuck these privileged feminazis kept on crying wolf about their men boarding planes to find love somewhere else, when all those same women did to them at home soil is nothing more than physical, economical, and mental exploitation.

 

            And then this, in turn, led to a state when these "strong and independent" women felt like used goods, tossed aside past their prime. This state is known as the women "hitting the wall." Of course, as an anthropologist who pretends to be a linguist myself, this is a metaphorical term for women aged 35 and up and still unmarried, living by themselves. They were fed these sugar-coated pieces of piping hot cow shit by the feminazis that they are strong, independent queens who doesn't need a man, and when she wants a man, it's for her own benefit and not for true love and affection. This phenomenon is currently and rapidly rising amongst Western women who just don't know better. Even with the rise of the passport bros movement, they even spew the "I don't need men" rhetoric if they see a Filipina woman living happily with an American man, although that statement, and that attitude at large would come back and bite them in the oversized, botox-filled ass. 

 

            I guess I should reiterate that marriages, or any other form of romantic relationships in general, works both ways for the man and the woman. Men is traditionally seen as a breadwinner, working outside the home to provide for his family. The women, although nowadays can enter the workforce, are also have important role as a homemaker, which consists of cooking, cleaning, and provide emotional, personal, and intimate support to their man. Men provide the family with financial stability (with the help from his wife, mind you), and the women provide emotional and intimate support. And this is the one aspect modern women have destroyed in the wake of modern-day feminism and the #MeToo movement. Men are no longer investing for a long-term relationship or even to meet women at all. They see this as obsolete now, and women are now suffering form the unintended consequences of their own movement.

 

            I guess since the #MeToo movement, Western men are constantly walking on eggshells to the point that they are not bothered to seek romantic relationship in Western soil. Now, those same men are flocking into Latin American region and the continent of Asia or Africa for a better lease of life. For those who are unlucky enough to obtain a passport themselves, they simply just stand up and walk away, giving absolutely zero fucks about women. Since #MeToo, men are loudly saying #NotMe. You might think that this is just a delusion of grandeur, but this is the unintended consequences of modern-day feminism. And as men, we are comfortable with this now. 

Your Mother, Your Savior: The Insane Story of Achraf Hakimi

 Well, what do we have here? I know I'm writing about someone's getting divorced, but this is juicy, considering the economical implication that emerged from this divorce proceedings. As we all know, the family court system, at least in the Western hemisphere, heavily favors women when it comes to divorce, custody disputes, even alimonies. Men are left with almost little to nothing, even if the other side is deemed incapable of sustaining themselves should the court ruled in the women's favor. And this has happened too many times than I can remember.

 

            But over in France, some news about a Moroccan footballer being divorced by his Spanish wife has made the headlines of every social media site and any news sites in that regard, and the news can only be as juicy as it gets. Before diving into the news, let's get to know both parties. The man in this story is Achraf Hakimi, a Moroccan footballer who currently plays his football at Paris Saint Germain of France, and a member of the famous 2022 Morocco squad who secured 4th place at the 2022 FIFA World Cup. He was the one who scored the winning penalty to send Spain packing from the tournament, ensuring his team's spot at the quarterfinals. What makes his case unique is he might have Moroccan citizenship, but he was actually born in Madrid, Spain, and spent majority of his youth career inside the Real Madrid Academy. Despite this, he qualified for Morocco due to his parental heritage, both parents are Moroccan. 

 

            And on the opposite side we have Hiba Abouk, full name Hiba Aboukhris Benslimane (this is a Spanish naming custom, the paternal name is listed first, followed by the maternal name). She is 12 years senior of Hakimi and is known in her homeland as an actress. She is a Spanish citizen of Libyan and Tunisian descent. It also important to highlight that due to the age discrepancies, Hakimi was 18 years of age when he married Abouk. Despite the fact, the couple welcomed two sons. 

 

            And now, let's get to the context of this story. It all started when Hakimi was accused of attempted sexual harassment of a 24-year-old woman, an accusation that is serious, yet still not been proven. Knowing the news, Abouk filed for divorce and demanded half of Hakimi's fortunes, since he has a net worth of about US$ 24 Million. Remember, the family court system heavily favors women over men, and with sexual harassment allegation at play, Abouk would surely be granted most if not half of her husband's fortunes, as well as full custody over their sons. But Hakimi on the other hand, had other ideas. Yes, he is paid a hefty sum of money playing for PSG, one of the biggest football clubs in France, but 80% of his wages, as well as his other assets are registered UNDER HIS MOTHER'S NAME. And this is done way before the scandal broke out. What initially thought would be an easy trial then went south for Abouk, as Hakimi is deemed "broke" according to the law. Hell, if the laws are similar, Hakimi should be the one who benefited from this, as she is now richer than him in light of this revelation. As it turns out Hakimi and his mother have a close relationship, as evidenced by their interaction back in Qatar, as well as other Moroccan players. 

 

            And from this fact, Hakimi's case went viral in a short time. Most men on various social media apps praised the move, claiming that Hakimi had "broke the matrix" and he "rewrite the playbook" when it comes to divorce proceedings. But all he did was something a loving son would do to his mother: make her happy and proud. On the other hand, the radical feminists were seething mad, calling him "mommy's boy" as if it was a bad thing. In the Arab World, as well as in the Islamic culture, it is seen as a good sign if someone is having a close, loving relationship with their mother. As one of the sayings said, "The paradise is located beneath a mother's foot". even the Prophet Muhammad PBUH stressed the importance of a mother's unconditional love. As it would be a savior of someone during the Judgement Day. 

            

            And in the end, not even the most beautiful women or the most notorious gold diggers can persuade a man to abandon his mother. Just because the man is already married, his mother can be neglected all at once. From Achraf Hakimi we learn that no matter how old we are and how successful we are, our mother would still view us as "her baby child". To all the mothers out there reading this, know that this story would serve as a wholesome reminder that in this hectic world, a mother's love remains unconditional.

Lolcows: The Biggest Source of Internet Cringe

         When you surfed on the Internet for an extended period of time, you probably will encounter several internet personalities or celebrities who are famous for plethora of things, whether their personality, their likeability, or their sense of humor. Some of them are also known to be the biggest laughingstock of the world wide web, they themselves being totally oblivious of the fact. These types of people are easily discoverable on every corner of the web, mostly on social medias, and people can't help but to witness their degeneracy as the means of boosting internet clout. 

 

            There is a term that would describe these people perfectly, and the term in question is "lolcows". It borrows its own term from "cow", which is a farmstock animal typically raised for the milk to be harvested. And from this definition, a lolcow is a type of person on the internet who is gullible and highly exploitative, typically trolled in regular basis with the means of producing cringeworthy content or to divulge embarrassing information to be weaponized against them just for fun without them realizing it for one bit. In short, lolcows are more or less like a "cash cow", but instead of monetary revenue, the internet is spoiled with funny, mostly cringe content generated by some people who are unaware that they are being manipulated, often extensively. 

 

            There is a big rift when it comes to lolcows and those who are presented as a legitimate comedian on the web. Comedians tend to plan their contents carefully, accounting for their viewer base, and are doing it willingly. Lolcows on the other hand, are trying to present themselves as a serious creator, but inexplicably ended up producing content that are instead perceived to be unintentionally hilarious, despite the creator's initial direction.

 

            When it comes to the world-renowned lolcows, Chris Chan immediately sprung up to mind. Since he is the most documented person on the internet, if not the world, every move he did is meticulously recorded, including his (mis)adventures of finding his true love, even if it means that he must post videos or contents with compromising materials, or his full-blown delusions about the animated dimension and the real world being merged together. From the discovery of his Sonichu comics to his arrest and subsequent incarceration for incest, everything and anything that he has ever done was meant to be on a serious note, but alas, the internet never gave its two cents, and instead presented him as the biggest buffoon ever lived. When it comes to the epitome of a lolcow, Chandler is the first person come into mind.

 

            Lolcows of this caliber tend to perceive everything according to their viewpoints only and dismissing what the outside world said about them. This then, created a perfect recipe for internet disaster, as more people inevitable came to their contact, and ended up getting trolled relentlessly. One particular person who also fits this category other than Chris Chan, is the man named Chance Wilkins, or Cyrax as known to the Internet. To say that Cyrax and Chandler is alike if not one of the same is an understatement. While Chandler is autistic and has a big obsession of becoming a comic book artist, Cyrax on the other hand, is deluded enough to think that he is a famous rapper, while in reality, he is a 30-ish year old, 5 feet (1.52 meters) tall, rage-filled man-child known as a plagiarist, sexual assaulter, a pedophile, and a narcissist. Why a plagiarist? Well, his own music catalogue, even his own stage name is nothing but stolen materials from other artists. His obsession with fame in the music industry is the main reason why this man is known as the lolcow of the year after Chandler's incarceration. Trolls use this to enable his fantasies and manipulating him extensively. His appearance on its own is more likely a result of several physical deformities, like progeria. It is also rumored that he may have a condition called cleidocranial dysplasia, where certain bones in the body don't develop. He is also born with one kidney and developed lung issues. These deformities, either physically or mentally, are mainly stemmed by his parents, specifically his mother's alcohol addiction by the time of Cyrax's conception. Some might say that both of his parents are intellectually disabled. 

 

            I don't know how others would react, but the mukbang genre of YouTube can also produce gold when it comes to a lolcow being loose on the Internet. Case in point, the big, fat, ugly mess that is Nikocado Avocado. For years, hundreds and thousands of eyes watched the evolution (in this case, an evolution going in reverse) of this former vegan and a skilled violinist from a relatively healthy man to an obese degenerate who does nothing but gorging himself on fast food in large quantities and screaming and wailing like a middle-aged woman with a midlife crisis. Watching his mukbang videos is bizarre enough, and the fact that he also operates an OnlyFans account doesn't help his case. Some lolcows that fit this description are also known for their love-hate relationship with fans and trolls alike. Just look at Amberlynn Reid. What this lady have done is starting a YouTube channel to document her weight loss journey, but quickly devolved into a mukbang channel, plus all the stuff that she did that incurred the wrath of the Internet. It seems like there is a cycle of some sort when it comes to this woman's whole content. She started by promising to try a new diet plan, then subsequently abandon it, and when confronted, she spewed lies after lies to present herself as the victim of her own laziness. What makes her a lolcow in this sense is the presence of enablers-who are her own friends and girlfriends-further stroking her planetary-sized ego (and body).

 

            Egotism, it seems can contribute to someone being labeled on the Internet as a lolcow, as their strong sense of entitlement trumps all of their strong points, making them susceptible for trolling and online harassment. Some of the can be outright creepy. One instance of this is someone by the name of Daniel Larson. This Denver, Colorado native is actually a schizophrenic man known for his TikTok escapade, as well as his rather unusual behavior, particularly towards underage girls on the platform. Hell, he once had a ridiculous amount of underage smut material, and nonchalantly confess it to the internet. Talk about being bold and outright dumb at the same time. As with Cyrax, Larson is also highly delusional about being a famous musician, always convinced that he is a big-time celebrity, but in reality, the trolls only engage with him to enable his fantasies and ultimately humiliate himself without him even realize it for one bit.

 

            In short, lolcows are those type of people who are oblivious to the fact that their presence on the internet is nothing more than a subject of amusement for trolls to indulge. They might present themselves as serious and factual, but all the trolls see is jokes and pranks written all over them. These people would still engage themselves on the internet, sometimes to the point of being terminally online, just to be played and manipulated upon by the other, not-so-friendly internet users. For those of you who are writing this, let's assess your life, take a break from the internet, and please, for the love of God, socialize outside more. It helps yourself and your mental wellbeing.